Cami is as independent of a character you can get. She’s a writer that observes people, imagining their lives and motives, but ultimately pushing them away to remain in her bubble. When faced with someone seeking more, a typical ‘white-picket fence’ life, she wants nothing more than to run. While she struggles to determine what she really wants in life, her own decisions and discoveries leave her even more at odds. There’s more to loneliness than being lonely. Cami struggles with this existential dread that seems to have her denying wanting anything more for herself. From the start she says about relationships:

“I’m only twenty-nine years old, but I’ve pretty much seen and done it all. What are my choices, really? Apparently, the road to happiness must be traveled in vehicles I loathe: Sacrifice. Compromise. Surrender.”

I found it almost comical reading this at beginning of her narrative. Maybe it was hard to be in her shoes in this aspect but being in your twenties and thinking you’ve seen it all really stuck with me. I’ve been there. Then, of course, a few years or months pass and perspective hits you in the face. Cami is very analyzing to her own feelings but keeps this all in. Being the reader to these thoughts and feelings was a great choice and one of my favorite aspects to the book. To an outside perspective, it would be difficult to like Cami’s character and the actions she takes. Of course, most of her behavior seems to be a challenge to others and how they’ll react. While I type this, I realize how critical it may sound towards Cami. Ultimately, she’s human and has made mistakes. She struggles and is down to earth in a way that she is completely drifting aimlessly. Like many of us. She doesn’t know what she doesn’t know. It’s when everything starts to fall apart and her emotions are on the peak of exploding that she starts to snap out of this.

I went to Catholic school for ten years. Has this made me more faithful? Has this made me less? I can say is that it gave me clarity towards living constantly surrounded by faith and then not when I left. I share this because I can see why this Christian Fiction can have mixed views. Faith isn’t always easy. Especially if your intention is to share it with someone. I think that All In shares something different here. An emotional path, one with desperation but also acceptance. Maybe faith won’t heal all wounds but it helps accept them. I think Cami finds most of her peace this way. After living her formative years thinking it was normal to feel underwhelmed, meaning in God gives her hope for more.

Funnily enough, the ending reminded me of one of my favorite books, Life of Pi. I won’t share spoilers, but the book definitely had subtle metaphors that made me think of it. Not every person of faith or none will like the ending. Or maybe they will. It depends on our own emotional journey and what has lead us to this point. Maybe even putting aside faith, a reader will appreciate the impressive first novel Simonds released. They’ll enjoy the inner complexities of Cami and hopefulness of Kate. They’ll love the building of scenes that paint descriptive and engaging imagery that spark your imagination. They’ll think on their own faith and discuss it with others. A success in my opinion!